Trent "Buffalo Bill" Vance Creates New Blog!

I've created a new blog focused exclusively on The Wild West Show.

All articles posted so far on The Casual Reporter have been copied to a new blog entitled, "Buffalo Bill's Blog." Future articles I write relating to Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill), Disney Village, Disneyland Paris France, will be published on the more appropriately titled "Buffalo Bill's Blog."

The Casual Reporter will focus on news and entertainment not directly related to the Wild West Show, such as Joke of the Day, Iraqi Throws Shoes at Bush, and the Armistice Day video. So you'll want to be sure you keep reading The Casual Reporter, but to receive future Wild West Show news and entertainment you'll probably also want to subscribe to Buffalo Bill's Blog. You can do so from the blog itself. I'll keep a permanent link between blogs on each blog so you can always click between them.

Wrangler National Finals Rodeo Pool Begins

The 50th Wrangler National Finals Rodeo (WNFR) has begun in Las Vegas Nevada. The WNFR is the ultimate competition for cowboys and cowgirls. Fifteen of the cast of Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill) Disney Village, Disneyland Paris France, have started a friendly pool to follow the 10-day rodeo. Each participant in the pool draws at random a number from 1 - 15 which refers to the PRCA athletes' world standings on the day after the 1st round (we were late in making the draw). Over the course of the rodeo, one point is awarded for each $1,000 earned by each athlete, all winnings rounded down to the nearest $1,000. The player with the most points at the end of the WNFR wins the pool.

The Casual Reporter has created a web page to track the winnings as the rodeo advances. Allocations of the athletes are based on my assumptions according to my understanding and are not official. I will adjust them if needed after consulting with Byron and Brice. Just click on the cowboy anywhere in The Casual Reporter to access the site.

Trent Whacked in Head with Tennis Racket

The sad part is it was self-inflicted. To say my back-hand needs improvement is like saying the Mojave Desert could use a little moisture. I have no back-hand. A hand with a back, yes, but backhand, not so much.

Why did I even swing? I was racing after a ball that was way out of bounds anyhow. Maybe a better question is HOW did I swing? How did I manage to miss the ball completely but nail my forehead? I can assure you that grace was not involved. The idea, as I ran full-speed away from the net, was to give a hefty enough flick backwards to return the ball from far out of bounds, just to keep the volley going. So I hefted and I flicked, but ball I hit not. Forehead though, I hit squarely. (As my hairline recedes and my forehead expands, when do I drop the "fore" and just say "head"?)

Spread some cheer this Christmas with the new "Elfis" eCard from AmericanGreetings.com.

Why am I admitting all this? Because the bump on my head is pronounced enough to be potentially distracting on stage tomorrow and people are bound to ask what happened. Best get the humiliation started early to end early. Yeah right. Perhaps this is penance for the fun I poke at Pinkie. Ah well, it's a small price to pay.

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The Pinkie Chronicles: Face Plant into the Arena

Ah Pinkie, why does it always happen to you?

It started so innocently during the Medicine Ball Pass when Pinkie climbed over the rail to enter the arena. He turned around so he was facing the arena, his heels balanced on the wooden lip 3 feet off the surface of the arena and at the base of the rail, ready to step down into the arena. Only after he started tipping his weight forward to hop into the arena did he sense his spur was caught in the only hole in the entire side of the arena (in which a sprinkler head is hidden).

Pinkie's head went south but Pinkie's foot stayed north. Like a tree, or maybe a tall shrub, Pinkie teetered over, gravity accelerating his descent. His face hit sand first, the foot still lodged for a split second well above his head, before he quickly kicked himself free and jumped to his feet. Pinkie looked around nonchalantly in the hope nobody had seen his face plant. I said over my microphone, with an amused but incredulous tone, "Pinkie, did you fall out of the Ranch?"

"Oh, man!" he said, crimson-faced with a big Pinkie grin. "Why did you have to say anything?! Nobody noticed until you said something!"

Trent Hauls a Washing Machine

Pickup trucks are relatively rare in France and when I first arrived every time I saw one I pined for the truck I'd sold before moving here. I'd say to my wife something like, "Wow, look at that pickup. We should get one. They're so practical, like if you need to haul a washing machine or something." My wife would smile sympathetically and we'd go on our way.

When we were shopping for a vehicle and came across a van for sale I'd always make a similar comment. "That'd be good," I'd say. "It'd be great if we ever needed to haul a washing machine or something." This went on for years, me seeing a van or pickup or truck and absentmindedly making the comment, "That'd be great if we needed to haul a washing machine or something."

Finally, after one such comment, my wife said "What is it with you and washing machines? How often do you need to haul a washing machine? Is that what you do in Wyoming for fun, haul washing machines?" We laughed, but she had a point.

A few days later I was talking to Kevin about the PT Cruiser he'd just bought. He was proud he'd gotten it for 3,000 Euros less than the sticker and it was comfortable, had a nice stereo, etc. Then he opened up the hatch back to show me the inside and said, "This is what I really like. The back opens up and you can push the seats forward. It's big enough you could haul a washing machine in it."

What is it with the washing machine? Check this out:

The Porsche Cayenne is the sportiest, best-performing SUV, a high-performance machine that will fit a family of five, haul a small washing machine, tow a large boat and get you through the woods when there's no road.

A Porsche? Who the hell owns a Porsche and needs to haul a washing machine? Through the woods, when there's no road? Who would haul one in a Porsche even if they could? How did we men get into our heads that we all need to be able to haul washing machines? Perhaps it's a symbol of virility: being able to haul a washing machine is like being able to satisfy a woman. Size does matter.

In any case, I was very pleased a few years ago when we bought an Opel Zafira, a family minivan-type car that can seat seven but can also quickly convert into a large cargo space. Yesterday when I pulled up to the Indesit Factory Outlet store to buy a new washing machine I knew my moment had arrived. We selected our unit and waited for the guy to dolly it out to the car, then I opened up the back door. The Indesit man and I lifted the corner of the machine up to the bumper. As we tipped the machine upwards, he said of the opening to my car, "I'm not sure it's going to be tall enough." I smiled, confident, as we easily slid the washing machine into the car. I said, "Now THAT's a good car." He chuckled and smiled knowingly as if to say, "Indeed, my good friend, indeed. That IS a good car."

Kave Wins Golf Tournament

(image borrowed from the Bestpar Blog)

Last Sunday it snowed for the first time this season in Marne la Vallee, France the home of Disneyland Paris Resort, but this didn't stop the golfers participating in the annual Beaujolais tournament. According to Kave, a Native American from the Crow tribe in southern Montana who plays Sitting Bull in Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill) Disney Village, Disneyland Paris Resort, the golfers started playing in cold rain. Although the tournament organizers shortened the tournament to just 9 holes in light of the poor weather, the golfers didn't escape the snow as small snowflakes started spiraling to the ground during the final hole. By the time golfers were in the clubhouse enjoying the fine feast that also marks the tournament, the snowflakes had grown considerably in size and number.

But the real news is that Kave won the tournament! Kave, a Crow Indian, is proud to have learned golfing purely by playing it and watching others play. He's never taken a lesson and doesn't use the driving range. Yet during the Beaujolais tournament he competed against two golf-pros and a number of other golf veterans and won! Kave jokes that he's not a professional, he's a Crow-fessional. He won a piece of baggage that, he says, will be perfect for his upcoming short trip to Oregon in the United States to visit the grandfather he's never met.

Cowboy Finishes Ride from USA to Jerusalem

Couy Griffin, ex-Cowboy in Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill) Disney Village, Disneyland Paris Resort France, has spent the last several months traveling horseback (as much as possible) from the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco to the Gates of Jerusalem in a quest to glorify the name of Jesus. The video below shows the culmination of this rather incredible journey.

Last week I overheard someone saying they'd seen Couy in Paris, apparently on his way back to Ireland and the United States.

Ex-Buffalo Bill Steve Rally Interviewed on KTLA

Steve Rally, Playgirl's "Man of the Year, Man of the Decade and Man of the Millenium", star of Playgirl's workout video "Hunkersize" and ex-"Buffalo Bill" in Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill), Disney Village, Disneyland Paris Resort, FRANCE, recently gave an interview on Hollywood's KTLA morning news as "Sebastian the Black," the character he plays in Pirates Dinner Adventure in Buena Vista, CA. He is every bit as magnificent a pirate in the interview as he is a hunk in "Hunkersize" giving me hope that I, too, can have an illustrious career beyond Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show if ever my Buffalo Bill gig peters out. Steve is truly shameless and for that I have the warmest affection for him. Go Steve!

Ex-Cast Update: Scott Bramble

Scott Bramble, who played the Stunt position at Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill) Disney Village, Disneyland Paris in the late 90's, is now Director of Post Production at BASE Productions in Los Angeles, according to my latest web research. Prior to that he was a Post Supervisor for GRB Entertainment where he worked on A&E's Intervention, Post Supervisor at VBP Productions, and Assistant Editor at Aardvark Post. Those who have seen Intervention give it high reviews. Now that he's a Director we can all anticipate seeing his name more often in the trades papers.

The Pinkie Chronicles: Not the Chicken...!

The Cattle Trail scene unfolded as usual up to the chicken shooting scene. Beli shot the first chicken and Pete grabbed it. The next line is usually, "That's too small, we need another chicken" but Brice said instead, "Pete's got a chicken, I want one too" so Beli shot another. Instead of calling for a third chicken, which leads to the musicians entering, Brice said, "Well, we each got our chickens. Let's eat! Come on, boys!"

Continuing further at this point would have meant jumping the scene forward several minutes and not allowing the musicians to enter, so the team was stuck for a few seconds, the guys making their way for the cooking pot.

Then Pinkie stepped in, shouting loud enough I could hear him off stage through the other microphones "I want a cheeckin too! I'm hungry!"

So Beli shot the large, roasted chicken to the ground. Pinkie leaped on it, a fun and innocent choice had it not been Pinkie, and Brice on the microphone.

Brice said, "Not here, Pinkie! This is Disneyland!"

And the scene continued..

The Pinkie Chronicles: Pinkie Loses Hat Both Shows.

Pinkie lost his cowboy hat in both shows tonight. In the first, it came off as he was crossing to the Gold Star Ranch during my introduction of the Rough Riders, landing at the edge of the arena in front of Gold Star - an innocent enough error, but because the hat was Pinkie's, it became a target.

Most horses will notice something out of the ordinary like Pinkie's hat on the ground and will prick their ears at it, maybe snort, usually making an effort at least to avoid stepping on it. When I rode near it to get out of Annie Oakley's way so she could shoot the candles of the candelabra, for example, my horse lurched sideways enough to elicit a hearty laugh from the line of cowboys.

Annie's horse is not at all like my horse. Her horse took absolutely no notice of the hat, enabling Annie to subtly but intentionally aim her horse to nail Pinkie's hat perfectly, stomping it and kicking it forward several yards, eliciting an even bigger laugh from the cowboy line-up. The scene continued until, as Annie circled for her exit, I subtly said over the microphone, mainly for the cowboy's benefit, "one more chance". Annie bowled into Pinkie's hat again, sending it forward another few yards.

The cowboys' exit punished Pinkie's hat further, but it stayed on stage. Later, when the Chuckwagons entered for the Cattle Trail scene, Chad was able to run his team and both right hand chuckwagon wheels directly over Pinkie's hat. It's a small thing, losing a hat, but it provided ample entertainment for the cowboys.

In the second show, Pinkie beat Brice's roping time by 0.3 seconds, winning it for Gold Star. Brice feined fury over the call. It might have ended there had it not been Pinkie. When Annie handed the winner's flag to Pinkie and Pinkie started the winning round, Brice galloped after him, grabbing and wrestling with him as they circled. Pinkie tried in vain to fight Brice off, but with one hand on his reins and the other carrying the flag, his only defense was to try to awkwardly hit Brice with the flag. Not only did this appear awkward and endearingly pathetic, it utterly failed to deter Brice and resulted only in Pinkie's own hat being knocked off in front of Gold Star.

Didier Pulls His Ass with His Crotch

Didier, who plays Auguste Durand Rouel in Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill), Disney Village, Disneyland Paris France, and Cacahuete, the ass, or burro he rides into the arena for his second entrance, have a special relationship marked most famously by the "mounting episode" years ago. Tonight their relationship has added another layer.

To appreciate the visual I am about to create, you need to know that Cacahuete's halter rope is tied back onto itself beneath Cacahuete's chin to create a closed loop similar to roping reins. The Auguste character uses these "reins" to ride Cacahuete into the arena and half-way across it before dismounting, at which time a handler leads Cacahuete the remaining distance to the upstage exit.

Recently Cacahuete has begun the bad habit of ducking out from under his rider and rolling in the sand for several seconds, upstaging everyone and upsetting the rhythm of the show. To help school Cacahuete out of this habit, Didier was instructed to keep hold of Cacahuete's reins and lead him across the arena if he tried to stop and roll.

Tonight, when Cacahuete ducked and stopped, Didier slid over Cacahuete's head and, as instructed, kept hold of the reins. But rather than step over the "reins" and pull Cacahuete beside him, Didier remained straddling the looped rope, holding it in one hand just above his crotch. The lines of the loop extending from his hand pulled down along the sides of his genital area and cut into the creases separating thigh from genitals, effectively framing and highlighting his crotch area. Cacahuete pulled from behind, making taut the "reins" and further highlighting Didier's crotch. For several meters Didier continued to awkwardly lead his ass with his crotch, seemingly amused and bewildered by the predicament he had gotten himself into and apparently not sure how to get out of it when finally a handler rescued him, rescued all of us from what can only be described as absurd, borderline obscenity. And so their love saga continues...

Despite the absurdity of the entrance, Cacahuete did NOT roll in the sand.

Nik Receives Wedgy of the Century

I've never seen a more severe wedgy in my life.

The Green River cowboy had just won the Pony Express race. Nik, Green River's clown for the night, capped off the audience cheer with his trademark backwards pratfall off the ranch rails into the arena while Gene, an Indian playing "dancer" for the evening, was at his post in front of the downstage doors.

As I explained to the audience the rules for the the Rescue Relay race, I noticed Gene trot over to Nik and start rough-housing with him in the arena. As Nik tried to climb out of the arena into the Green River ranch, Gene pulled Nik back down by his clown pants, breaking the back buttons of Nik's suspenders in the process and revealing the top band of Nik's underwear.

Gene then leaped over the rail into the ranch to block Nik climbing out of the arena, when apparently he got the idea to give Nik a wedgy. Standing about 6'3" against Nik's about 5'5", Gene had little trouble leaning over Nik, grabbing hold of his shorts, and pulling, essentially suspended Nik in mid-air.

The black fabric of Nik's underwear stretched up his back nearly to the base of his shoulderblades. The leg-holes of Nik's underwear came so far up his backside that not just his butt cheeks but several inches above his butt cheeks were fully visible from the judge's stand. Nik hung helplessly, his body tense but not flailing for fear of serious injury to his private parts, his upward progress blocked by Gene's body.

Then Gene started bouncing Nik in his own shorts, revealing even more skin through the leg holes and covering more of Nik's back. Nik's future as a potential father was only saved by the start of the Rescue Relay race. This time the warriors really did rescue someone.

Didier Marries Two Gay Men

DIDIER COURQUET MARRIED TWO GAY MEN the other day. Here's the whole story:

One remarkable aspect of Disneyland Paris Resort is the vast diversity of the workforce. Dozens of countries are represented, dozens of languages spoken. Men, women, straight, gay, single, married, black, yellow, white, with and without children, small people (politically correct lexicon for “dwarves” or “midgets”), big people, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Jewish, Atheist, god-fearing American conservative, Liberal socialist European – all are represented at Disneyland Paris. It should come of little surprise then that at the same time former cowboy Couy Griffin is riding across France in a self-proclaimed one-man crusade to spread the message of the love of Jesus, our own Didier Courquet, a self-proclaimed Buddhist who plays the character Auguste Durand Rouel in Buffalo Bill’s Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill), Disney Village, Disneyland Paris Resort, France, recently performed a marriage ceremony for a gay couple.

Here in France, both gay and straight couples can be legally bound through what amounts to legally recognized common-law marriage, with similar benefits as couples who are married via legally binding ceremonies. When couples are married in a civil ceremony, the town mayor performs the official duties, but mayors are strictly forbidden to preside over ceremonies for gay couples.

This is where Didier comes in. One gay couple, keen to marry as straight couples do, decided to hire Didier to play the role of the mayor in a faux-ceremonial marriage. So effective was Didier’s performance (says Didier) that the guests were initially uncomfortable that (they thought) the mayor was performing an illegal ceremony. In addition to functioning as the faux-mayor, Didier sang a French love song for the gay couple, at their request. Didier said it was all very nice and beautiful, but the kiss at the end was a bit uncomfortable. With good food, a festive atmosphere, and plenty of gay couples to draw from, I think Dider may have discovered an enjoyable and sufficiently lucrative second career for himself.

The Boys Watch The Palio in Italy

Mike, a Stuntman and Buffalo Bill Understudy, and Brice, Cowboy and Stageocoach driver - both in Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill), Disney Village, Disneyland Paris Resort - took some time off recently to visit ex-WWS Cowboy Jean Carlo and his wife Tracy at their remote horse ranch in the Tuscany region of Italy. Ryan was also there, still on his European visit from Canada. While there, Mike and Brice got a front-row view of the famous no-holds-barred Palio horse race, featured in these videos. I was talking to Brice about his experience and I mentioned to him that before I moved to France I imagined Europeans as generally more sophisticated and less wild than Americans, especially cowboys. That stereotype gets badly thrown out of kilter, however, with European traditions like the Palio. These videos show the Italians who ride in the Palio, as well as their frenzied supporters, as downright crazy, at least during the brief time of the race.

Brice also told me about some volcanic tombs they visited where the density of the pourous volcanic stone was so low he could easily pick up a calf-sized chunk with one hand. Of course stuntman Vincent can do the same with solid granite. He is so very LAARge.. he will Mess you UP!

10,000 B.C. Released for iTunes

The film 10,000 B.C. featuring our own Afif Ben Badra as the main bad guy, has just been released for download on iTunes. Ben also plays Cowboy or Indian on an intermittent basis for our show, Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show, (La Legende de Buffalo Bill), Disney Village, Disneyland Resort Paris.

Jesse James Nearly Crushed by Horse

Jesse James Townsend, who plays Cowboy and sometimes Stunt in Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill), Disney Village, Disneyland Paris Resort France, was nearly crushed during the Roping Contest of the Rodeo Games when the Bay mare he was riding stumbled and fell. Jesse was launched over her front left shoulder and landed hard, his head thwacking against the packed sand surface of the arena. As he landed, Jesse struggled to scramble to safety but the horse's momentum carried her over the saddle and onto her right side, pinning Jesse's legs and leaving him directly exposed to her hooves with no way to escape. She kicked frantically for several seconds trying to right herself, each kick seeming as if it must be connecting with Jesse. Finally she found her footing and struggled to her feet. I expected Jesse to have something broken or twisted and need immediate medical attention, but he rose slowly to his feet, visibly shaken but apparently sound. He dusted the biggest chunks of muck off his clothes and walked over to the mare without assistance. The cowboys and the actress playing Annie Oakley had lead the mare away from Jesse and re-adjusted the saddle, which had come askew in the process. As all true cowboys do when they come off a horse, he didn't walk off stage but simply got back on and did his job. The second time around Jesse's horse didn't stumble and he caught Cremelo handily. Afterwards backstage Jesse said that he was kicked and pinned just as it appeared but he was lucky enough not to sustain serious injury. From what I saw I'd say very lucky. Nice work, Jesse!

Wild West Actor Stars in Major Hollywood Film

Ben Badra is The Warlord in one of Spring 2008's biggest feature films: 10,000 BC. This is old news to most of the cast of Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill), Disney Village, Disneyland Paris Resort, where Ben works frequently as either Cowboy or Indian to cover absences and injuries among the full-time cast. 10,0000 BC is not Ben's first on-screen role nor will it likely be his last. The Internet Movie Database (imdb.com) credits Ben currently in 12 acting roles and 9 stunt roles. Ben is also a talented and aspiring guitarist, singer, and songwriter, as highlighted on his MySpace video page. The Warlord is the lead bad guy in 10,000 BC and Ben's highest-profile role to date. Acting in the film has elicited phone calls and emails to Ben from film fans and film industry professionals around the world. Those of us who work with Ben at the show know him as a focused, energized, talented, and very likable professional performer no matter what role he is playing. These attributes and his striking physical features should allow Ben to build on his current success for years to come. Great work Ben! See you in the show..!

Couy Riding for Israel in France

Just before I left for the states with my family, Couy Griffin showed up at the Wild West Show. It was good to see him. I chatted with him for a few minutes and learned that he hadn't really mapped out exactly how he was going to get across France, it was just go with the flow I guess and trust in the Lord. I mentioned it must be strange for him setting foot in the show again, implying that the last time he was here he hadn't yet found Jesus and all that being born again implies. He said something to the effect that it was like coming back sober after having gone out partying all night long. Everyone seemed pleased to see him. Couy had finished crossing Ireland and England and was preparing for his journey across France and onwards towards Israel. I checked in on his YouTube site and found this video, but it was posted awhile back so I don't know how he's doing at the moment. Hopefully he's found a horse and some means of getting across France. Maybe he'll poke his head in again at the Wild West Show sometime soon. If I learn any more, I'll let you know.

Richard Lovelace Plays Buffalo Bill

Richard is the newest Buffalo Bill understudy! I took my family to the states during the first couple weeks of June and while I was gone Richard, one of the five remaining original cast members of Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show (La Legende de Buffalo Bill, in French) finally had the opportunity to play Buffalo Bill! Richie, as his friends often call him, is the quintessential cowboy character. If you see an authentic-looking 50-ish mustache'd cowboy walking around Disneyland Paris or Paris itself wearing a straw cowboy hat, vest, neckerchief, boots and Wranglers, there's a good chance it's Richard. He always wears his hat, and he usually wears a big smile on his face along with it. I haven't yet had a chance to watch Richard in action as Buffalo Bill but as soon as I do, I'll try to get some footage and post it for you all to see.